Labels
Categorised in: Insights
When you look at a bottle and see “salt” on the label, you expect white crystals to be inside. When you see the title on a book that says “Identifying Birds”, you expect to see various kinds of birds with colored pictures inside. If you see the title “Peace Child”, you have no idea if the book is about peace, children, a novel, or a short story. What labels do you wear? Are you more like the bird book, full of colorful personalities inside? Or do you have parts of you that are like short stories or mysteries, while other aspects of you are well developed, complex and growing? (See Insights article on the Host for further understanding.)
Do the labels given to us by the medical community, educational world, family, friends and ourselves really matter? All people need to be aware of their true identity in order to fulfill their destiny. Labels can encourage and cripple us. Medical diagnoses can pigeonhole a person for life. Discovering the labels in a person’s life, exploring their justifications, and deciding what to do with them is serious work for the dissociative person.
People often mistake their identity as their function or work. As in the definition of DID, each alter has a distinctly different consistent perspective of, or way of relating to themselves, others and their environment. There is usually a fear that arises from the alters that if they were to stop or change jobs, they would cease to exist. That thought resists change and healing.
If you are reading this, you should be familiar with the label Dissociative Identity Disorder or DID. Read Foundational Teaching: What is Dissociation. That is merely a term or label describing the way you survived trauma was to break your conscious thoughts and memories up into pieces. You separated part of yourself mentally from what was happening to get through the abuse without going crazy or dying. Some people are frightened by the label DID. They do not understand how creative your mind is to survive such horrible things. Guess what? That same creativity will help you heal more completely than someone whose mind retained all the trauma and did not separate.
So labels are not all bad, especially when they help people understand what is inside. You may have had other people put the wrong labels on you. For example, if they call you ADHD because your mind, conversation or body, switch quickly from one subject to the next. Or worse yet, if they diagnose you as schizophrenic because you report what you hear your alters saying inside. If you realize that you are not crazy just because you switch or hear voices, then you don’t have to believe those labels.
Another label that someone might put on you is that you are an alcoholic or addict or shop-aholic. These describe how a part of you acts when that aspect of you is in pain and trying to numb that pain. You are broken and part of you is stuck in a cycle that tries to cover the wounds in obsessive, negative ways. The alters who are experiencing the emotional and mental pain need your help because they may feel trapped and don’t know how else to deal with the traumas they have lived through. Rather than holding on to the label that you will always be an addict, get help to break free.
In a similar way that you put on different clothes each day, you can take off the old ways and work at taking on the positive attributes of who you were created to be. (Colossians 3:12) Find a therapist who understands your dividedness and will encourage you in your healing process. Work with and listen to the alters who are stuck before they act out their addictions.
You can label yourself in hurtful ways too. You can believe that you are “stupid” or “helpless” or “crazy”. Then you act on what you believe about yourself and operate as if you are stupid or helpless. Others see that and reinforce your belief of being stupid and helpless. But what is God’s truth about how He created you? Psalm 139:14-15 says: “I will…praise You, for…the awful wonder of my birth! Wonderful are Your works… My frame was not hidden from You, when I was being formed in secret, and intricately and curiously wrought (as if embroidered with various colors) in the depths of the earth…” Amplified Bible. Ask God to take down the old labels and put up His new ones.
You are like a beautiful, artistically colored and designed book. Inside is a rich variety of stories, touching poems, and stirring songs, mixed with heartbreaking events. The last chapters have not been written, so no one but God knows how it will all fit together. Some of the chapters may have inaccurate titles on them, but it is not too late to change that. Ask Jehovah God what titles He has given you. Wouldn’t you rather focus on what the Creator says you are than the label some doctor or relative stuck on you?
All this information about labels applies to both the outside and inside of you. The inside aspects of you can label themselves by proper names, jobs, functions, emotions or many other ways. They usually think that label is who they are, rather than what job or function they have. This may make it difficult for them to realize they can change.
For example, if a part inside you has always been the Bully, they may need help to see that there are much better ways to use their strength. They do not have to go away or lose their job, but they can choose to take on a more helpful job. The Creator God would be delighted to help them see more healthy ways to use their strengths, just ask Him.
It helps to use the Bible to find out who you were designed to be before the world was made. (Ephesians 1:4) Write down some positive verses of what your true identity is, on note cards and place them where you will see them often. Read those verses out loud several times a day so that all the parts inside can hear the truth. Our store also has some uplifting coloring books that will allow parts of you to color and process in healthy ways.
Whenever you find one extreme, look for the opposite belief also. These beliefs often have accompanying labels.
Talk to those parts of you who think they are stupid or have other negative thoughts. Find out who told them they were stupid, forgive and break off that word curse. Then help them rephrase their words to “I am learning” or “I am thankful that God gave me a good mind” (II Timothy 1:7 KJV) or other encouragements. Our store has the book “I Will Give You Rest” which is really helpful in general areas of changing your negativity. We have looked at new patterns of thinking about yourself and different ways of talking to yourself that will result in new behaviors. If you trip up in the same ways as before, do not get discouraged or go back to the old habits. Change is difficult, especially when you have been fractured. It is so encouraging that Yahweh who made you, loves you and His compassion never fails. You can start again fresh every morning because He is faithful! (Lamentations 3:22-23)